I am back from my little break, and have been catching up what on what everyone has been up to. This post at Cliff’s place made me chuckle, and though I vehemently avoid memes, I thought I would give this one a go.
1. My uncle once: told me a rude joke that made me laugh so hard a bit of wee came out.
2. Never in my life: have I said boo to a goose. Though I really want to, one day.
3. When I was five: I dated my first older woman. Not that I had much say in the matter.
4. High school was: about four years too long.
5. I will never forget: jumping out of an aeroplane.
6. Once I met: Paul Gascoigne, pre-mental health issues.
7. There’s this girl I know: who thought the space shuttle landed like the rocket on Button Moon.
8. Once, at a bar: I bought everyone in the place a drink. It was quite empty though.
9. By noon, I’m usually: turning off my alarm clock again.
10. Last night: I wrote a three-page introduction to a brochure for a lads holiday I am going on next month. It was loaded with Nazi jokes.
11. If only I had: the chance to do it all again.
12. Next time I go to church: will be a wedding or a funeral.
13. What worries me most: are things I think I’ve forgotten.
14. When I turn my head left I see: a window and a tree. Sometimes a squirrel or two.
15. When I turn my head right I see: a whiteboard with ideas for sketches on it.
16. You know I’m lying when: I over elaborate.
17. What I miss most about the Eighties is: my first BMX.
18. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be: Ford.
19. By this time next year: I’ll be playing it cool Trig. That’s right isn’t it?
20. A better name for me would be: I am a bit busy at the moment.
21. I have a hard time understanding: blind faith.
22. If I ever go back to school, I’ll: probably end up with another one of those restraining orders.
23. You know I like you if: I offer to buy you a drink.
24. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be: the courier, for successfully delivering the bribe.
25. Take my advice, never: argue with someone who has fifty pounds on you..
26. My ideal breakfast is: poached eggs on toast, with brown sauce and a large mug of coffee.
27. A song I love but do not have is: Sympathy for the Devil, The Rolling Stones
28. If you visit my hometown, I suggest you: take a long, long shower.
29. Why won’t people: do as I say?
30. If you spend a night at my house: let me know in advance. It saves on awkward breakfast conversation.
31. I’d stop my wedding for: about 20 minutes, then she might get a bit annoyed.
32. The world could do without: Jade Goody.
33. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: lick Jade Goody.
34. My favourite blonde(s) is/are: Sarah Alexander and Amy Smart.
35. Paper clips are more useful than: having someone hold your papers together for you.
36. If I do anything well it’s: probably because I copied someone else first.
37. I can’t help but: agree, most of the time.
38. I usually cry: extremely rarely. I can’t actually remember the last time. Actually I can, it was about four years ago.
39. My advice to my child/nephew/niece: don’t stand up in a rubber dinghy.
40. And by the way: all of the above is absolutely true, probably.
If you want to have a go, feel free.
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
I want poached eggs on toast now i’ve read that!
Pol x
Are you quite sure the space shuttle didn’t land like the rocket on Button Moon?
3 weeks and that’s it? Talk about phoning it in!
I do like the paperclips answer.. I had to think long and hard about that one.. but in the end I agree with you..
Have to agree with Vamos666 on this one Angry, This is all we get after three weeks of intermittent posting? What’s with this meme shit anyway are you suppose to answer the questions off the top of your head without thinking in which case there are a couple I would definitely want to take the Fifth Amendment over
I’ve said boo to a goose. It’s overrated. The better way to deal with a recalcitrant goose is to arm oneself with a broom and sweep it aside. Never turn your back on it. It takes you by the fleshy part of your thigh and twists (it didn’t do that to me, I had the broom)
You’ve all been spoilt, that’s the problem. I’ve got some proper posts coming up, don’t worry. This was me breaking myself back in easily…
Look, just ‘cos you’ve had 2 weeks sunning youself at the Billing Aquadrome, doesn’t mean you can get away with half-arsed posts. You’re supposed to be Angry, not a 15 year old girl. Who’s your fave pop star Angry?
I have been to Billing Aquadrome, a couple of times. And how do you know I’m not a 15 year old girl?
The times of your posts for a start (11:48 and 12:17?) my daughter is 15 in 6 weeks and I’m willing to bet that in the unlikely event of her being up at that time this morning she would be too busy being grumpy, hormonal and bad-tempered to post to a blog even as half-arsed an effort has you offered us today
I don’t do memes, they’re gay, and for 15 year old girls.
Which incidentally would have been answers to 2 of those questions.
OK OK, tomorrow you get a tale of me failing to pull a scouser. How’s that?
Ok, that tale MIGHT be good enough – but we know you’re not a 15 yr old girl because we heard you and the ever sexxeh Fat Jim in your podcast, remember? Hardly any 15 yr old girls have voices that low.
Exactly how do you fail to pull a scouser?
I can’t wait!
I think having a job puts you pretty much out of the running.