I was practically sat in the seat opposite him on the train before I even noticed him. In truth, I barely recognised him without the bear.
I got out my phone and sent a brief Twitter update, “Sat on a train opposite Roger de Courcey!”
Luckily for Roger I have always believed that celebrities appreciate members of the general public making a bit of an effort in their greetings to them. It must get very tiresome being heckled with, “Hey! Aren’t you that whatsisname off that thing on that channel?”
“I suppose it was just a waste of money to buy a ticket for Nookie then?” I quipped hilariously, simultaneously breaking the ice and letting him know I was not some run of the mill member of the public. It was clear that I care about my introductions to celebrities.
“I’m sorry?” replied Roger.
“I’m just not used to seeing you without Nookie bear, you know.” I added, whilst doing my best impression of Nookie Bear’s googly-eyes and moving my naked hand like a puppet.
“Hang on, do you think I’m Roger de Courcey?”
“Umm. You’re not?”
“No! He must be at least twenty years older than me!”
To be fair he had a point. My mental image of Roger de Courcey and Nookie Bear is based on their mid 1980′s television appearances. I suppose it is not unreasonable to assume that in lieu of selling his soul to the Devil, Roger de Courcey has aged somewhat since then. Plus this man in front of me did look a lot like the 1980′s Roger de Courcey. And he did not have a Nookie Bear anywhere in sight, which should have been a dead give away. If you are famous for having your hand up the arse of a bear it makes sense that you would ensure to have your hand inside him at all times so people would know who you were.
“I’m sorry,” I finished, apologetically. “It’s just that, you know, you do look a bit like him.”
I sat back in my seat and sent another Twitter update, “Ok. So it’s not Roger de Courcey, and he’s a bit upset at the implied resemblance.”
He returned to his newspaper, and we continued our mutual journey into London in uncomfortable silence.
{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
And yet this guy’s name is Roger, too. Amazing. Plus, he knew exactly who you were talking about. There’s more to this than meets the eye.
Still amused that you could call a bear “Nookie” and get away with it. Perhaps it’s the spelling – is Nooky ruder than Nookie? Something for us to think about in our Monday morning meetings.
Reminds me of the time I saw David Duchovny on a bench at Bond Street tube station. I had more sense than to accost him, however, so I am still confident it was David D. and not an imposter.
Z has it. Never, ever speak to your celebrity sighting because even if they are the celeb they’ll likely deny it. Even better, squint a little and don’t look at them straight on. You’ll find you see far more famous people that way. Just last week I saw Winston Churchill, Jamie Oliver and one of the hunters off the Lascaux cave walls.
NB – not TOGETHER mind, although that could be an interesting luncheon book club to join…
Well I saw YOU recently on the piste! Mr Angry.Snowboarding I think it was. I didn’t want to intrude but I thought, “Oh no, He’ll put me in his column, best let him get on abusing people. But I did think, ‘ere it,s that bloke off the internet who stops for crap burgers at service stations,he abuses bears, leave him alone, he’s not worth it!
ha, brilliant, he’d clearly had that before.
I bumped into Roger Moore once in town and he scared the living shit out of me as he had the real life presence of a Jack Nicholson character – total madness beneath the ice cool exterior.
Before that, Boy George. I think I was 13 and I said “you’re gay aren’t you?”. He said “No darling, just happy to see you”.
Groan
Had a pleasant encounter with Richard Dreyfus several years ago at the Kona Hawaii airport luggage point. Hawaiian Airlines had misdirected some of our flight’s luggage to another aircraft. While we waited, he was very nice and spoke to everyone who approached him.
Just as well he didn’t misunderstand you saying “Nookie” to him. I’d have bloody hit you – unless you were bigger than me in which case I’d have let Caz hit you.
Some old git pushed passed me at Old Trafford the other week in the programme queue. I was just about to confront him when I spotted that it was Bernard Hill. Couldn’t risk the headbutt or the assault with a Middle Earth sword, so I let it go and punched Marlon from Emmerdale who was following behind him.
Glammer – I really wished I had taken his picture, but it is hard to do surreptitiously when you are sat opposite someone, especially when you have drawn attention to yourself.
TOWTAL – Apparently his new puppet, a dragon called Fellatio, did not do well.
Z – That is the thing z, I can NOT let these things pass. I have to know for certain.
Al – It wasn’t me, I hired a lookalike for the week.
Peach – He was sporting an erection?!
xl – that story would be much better if the fourth word was ‘sexual’.
Four Dinners – That’s true, a seat for Nookie could mean something else entirely.
Duck – You should have tapped him on the shoulder and said, “Gizza job!” I bet no-one has ever done that before.
I’ve had my hand up the arse of a bear before. Well, it was more a couple of fingers actually. I don’t think it makes me a ventriloquist, though.
You should look on the bright side. It could actually have been De Courcey, who is, as it is widely known, a cunt.