October 2006

All in the timing

October 19, 2006

I went to see Lucy Porter at the local arts centre last Friday, she is funny and tells good jokes. Plus she was wearing a basque in one of her publicity shots so I thought it would be good for us to go see her in the flesh. You know to listen to her tell [...]

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I just don't get it

October 18, 2006

The law of averages suggests that someone reading this is going to able to explain something to me. Why, are DJ’s so revered in the clubbing scene? I am utterly blind to the reasons for the adulation of people who can work an old-fashioned record player. Oh, I’m sorry, my mistake, I meant people who [...]

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Cos I don't wanna

October 17, 2006

I read this over the weekend, and had to read it a couple of times before I fully understood what it was actually saying. It appears a Pharmacist refused to give the morning after pill to a 37 year-old woman, on the grounds that it offended his religion. The fact that he was a strict [...]

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Goldfish nation

October 16, 2006

I realise that not everyone can be blessed with Rain Man style total-recall like myself. There are people out there who forget things really very easily indeed. Your girlfriend forgets where she put her keys, your Dad forgets his glasses are actually on his head, and Bill Clinton forgot that he got noshed off in [...]

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My proudest moment

October 15, 2006

I don’t get many hits from Google, but over the last couple of days there’s been a few more heading my way than usual.  After a little investigation, it turns out that as of yesterday I am the number 1 hit on Google for “Estate Agents are cunts”. The Interweb truly is a wonderful device. [...]

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Greater London

October 13, 2006

London is a very big place. I don’t think I’ve ever been to a bigger city. However, I’ve only just realised how big it actually is. I have been searching for a cheap return flight to Portugal, and so asked the helpful website for options when flying from all London airports. Apparently, the best value [...]

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Please leave a message

October 12, 2006

“Hi Angry, its Rachel at the office, I’ve been trying to reach you all morning” “My phone was off as I was in a meeting, why didn’t you leave a message.” “Oh I didn’t feel like it.” This happens a lot. For some reason a number of the people I work with have an aversion [...]

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Doing a favour for a friend

October 11, 2006

I receive a text message. It reads, “Can you help me set up my wireless broadband?” My friends know that I like a gadgets, and so far seem completely unaware of my inability to use them properly. For this reason I am often asked technical questions like, What is the Interweb? and How do I [...]

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A shocking statistic

October 10, 2006

It seems the Risk Advisory Group has been doing some research on the CV’s (that’s ‘resumés’ for our American reader) that people submit for gainful employment up and down the country. They looked at 3,700 in total and it highlighted a quite alarming statistic. It appears, quite unbelievably, that 80% of people are telling the [...]

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Because there aren't enough words

October 9, 2006

This is the only explanation I can think of for this. I do think that Celebutard has a certain ring to it, but there’s clearly not enough sweariness involved. Can any of you come up with suitable new words for the next edition of the Dictionary. Any good ones we’ll adopt and try and get [...]

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