Please leave a message

October 12, 2006

“Hi Angry, its Rachel at the office, I’ve been trying to reach you all morning”

“My phone was off as I was in a meeting, why didn’t you leave a message.”

“Oh I didn’t feel like it.”

This happens a lot. For some reason a number of the people I work with have an aversion to leaving voicemail messages. This is a ridiculous aversion to have and is much like being scared of curtains. It makes no sense whatsoever. It also means that from time to time I won’t get a potentially important message. This pisses me off.

So, I have taken to putting my phone on silent whilst in important meetings so that I don’t miss these messages. The downside is that someone ringing me may feel ignored, as to them it will appear that my phone is ringing as normal, the upside being I can see every number that has tried to reach me whilst I’ve been incommunicado.

Yesterday I had 4 missed calls from the office.

“Hi, it’s Angry here, I’ve had 4 missed calls from the office, you don’t know if anyone is trying to reach me do you?”

“No, sorry. I can ask around if you’d like?”

“No, I have my suspicions, can you put me through to Rachel?”

“Sure, just a sec”

Ring Ring

“Hello Rachel fuckwit speaking.”

“Hi Rachel, Angry here. Have you been trying to reach me?”

“Oh, yes. I need to talk to you about tomorrows meeting.”

“Then why not leave a message to that effect? I am not a fucking psychic. If you have a message for me, then leave the fucking message!  It takes considerably longer to try and reach me four times than to leave one message, you do realise that don’t you?”

I called time on our little conversation when it sounded like she started to cry.

{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }

Badger October 12, 2006 at 8:12 am

I never leave voicemail as you never know who might be listening in.

I just belch down the phone and hang up.

B.

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Oli October 12, 2006 at 8:40 am

I dont mind leaving voicemail, though once i rang somebody asking,

“Hi, are you the new contingency planner on our project?”

Unfortunately it turned out his voicemail cut me off at

“Hi, are you the new cont”

This doesnt seem too bad till you realise that with my accent and when im in a rush talking fast Cont is very similar to Cunt.

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philip October 12, 2006 at 9:41 am

OK – so RF may not wnat to leave you a voice message – she may fear making a mistake / sounding stupid etc etc

What text messaging was invented for!

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Murphy October 12, 2006 at 10:13 am

Scared of Curtains!!?? Why cant these people just pull themselves together.

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Mr Angry October 12, 2006 at 11:15 am

Badger – you’d fit right in here…

Oli – You’re from the West country?

Philip – I’d accept a text, but nothing at all?!?

Murphy – you just can’t walk past an open door can you mate?

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Murphy October 12, 2006 at 11:22 am

Respect!

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mighty wright October 12, 2006 at 11:35 am

angry, its a well made point. surely thats the whole point of voicemail – to leave a message!
why ring and then expect someone to guess what you are calling about!

what I do like though is putting in names of people who i dont wish to speak to so i can vet their calls when they call! now that

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Ken October 12, 2006 at 12:45 pm

It’s not so bad if the whole telephone number (incl. extension) is transmitted.
What galls me are the plebs who phone anonymously AND don’t leave a message.
If they don’t try and call again it probably wasn’t important anyway…

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Oli October 12, 2006 at 1:47 pm

East im afraid!

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Lloyd October 12, 2006 at 2:43 pm

I never leave voicemail it means I have to pay vodofone the privalage of leaving a message only to have to call them again and pay vodaphone twice. The person who gets the message then has to pay their mobile provider the privalage of listening to me which, if they never wanted to hear me in the first place will, quite rightly, piss them off.

However angry, as you let me down with rates charity sponsorship (will you fuckers stop post), I’m going to leave you a substansially long (so you keep listening) porn voice mail

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Mr Angry October 12, 2006 at 2:53 pm

mighty wright – and how many on that list?

Ken – if they tried calling, it was important enough to speak to you… that’s my philosophy.

Oli – never mind. How many thumbs do you have?

Lloyd – you’re going to punish me by leaving me a long porno voicemail on a phone I don’t pay for? You don’t know me very well do you….

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philip October 12, 2006 at 3:55 pm

As you say – she is a Fuck Wit

No need to say anymore

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zed October 12, 2006 at 4:10 pm

i leave voicemails and my colleagues never get back to me.

i don’t know why i bother.

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Mr Angry October 12, 2006 at 4:33 pm

Philip – have you met her too?

zed – You should come and work here. I must warn you though, it’s not a twat-free zone…

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Ldbug October 12, 2006 at 5:31 pm

I leave messages, but I hate these messages people seem to leave me ALL THE TIME!excerpt “Hi! Crush, well, I was just calling to say ‘hi’ oh, and I went to my Mom’s birthday party this weekend, boy was it interesting. I think I got pretty drunk, but you know how I love wine. Then J showed up and it just went downhill from there! Then, last Monday I (blah, blah, blah, blah – for about another 3 min) bleep…

Next call “so I got cut off, anyway, I was saying that I went dancing, after working for 12 hours, can you believe that? (blah,blah————————————————–)OhandcallmebackIhavethatdatayouneedat4983-” bleep..

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BoyOnTop October 12, 2006 at 5:58 pm

There is an opposite side to this problem. People who leave too many messages. My phone is often on silent, whenever in a meeting or talking to someone that’s the state it goes in. I have a couple of people I’m trying to ween off leaving messages. Its annoying enough to come out of a meeting to 5 messages, its really realy annoying when they’re all from the same twat.

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z October 12, 2006 at 7:39 pm

I don’t care much for voicemail and I’m not too fond of phone calls. Email me and I may well get back to you. But if you must phone, don’t just hang up. Really. Idiots.

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ellie October 12, 2006 at 10:37 pm

It’s funny, I’ve got a colleague that we call Happy. He’s always getting voice mail messages. We all feel very comfortable talking into his voice mail.

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philip October 13, 2006 at 8:46 am

I haven’t met her, but certainly people like her

They are everywhere

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Oli October 13, 2006 at 8:56 am

4, doesnt everyone?

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FearlessFerret October 13, 2006 at 4:21 pm

ARRGHH! Voicemail, I have one person that leaves the same message everytime I dodge their call, “Hi, its Bill, can you give me a call, Thanks Bye” this is always followed by about a 5 second gap where he fumbles with the phone to hang up.

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